Another step on the journey

I'm one step closer to better health.

I saw my plastic surgeon Tuesday and signed the paperwork for a prophylactic double mastectomy and breast reconstruction. I'm going for the-one step procedure where the breast specialist (Dr. B) removes all the breast tissue and the plastic surgeon (Dr. T) then comes in to pretty the area up again.

After the breast tissue is removed Dr. T will insert implants, cover them with my skin and then fill them as much as she can with saline. She'll leave a port in my chest, through which she'll continue to add saline every two weeks until the breasts are the size I want. Then I'll have a quick surgery to remove the port and add nipples (if I decide I want them).

You could compare the whole procedure to a giant, wild party. After a night of debauchery, the clean up crew moves in to fix up the damage. Nothing will ever be the same again - the smashed lamp, the red wine stain on the carpet, the chip out of the coffee table - but the new living room looks respectable nonetheless. The party is quick and somewhat destructive, while the clean up takes spit, polish and time. And it's not the same - never the same - but quite acceptable.

Of course, there are risks to the procedure. If the skin that's stretched over the implants dies, I'll need another surgery. If the implant deflates over time, I'll need another surgery. There's also the risk of infection. Dr. T said because I'm choosing saline implants, I may notice some wrinkles in the skin or feel/hear the sloshing of the salt water when I move. That may be disconcerting, but it's certainly not dangerous.

Then there's the usual risks of anaesthesia, the pain and the recovery time. But I'd rather go through surgery and reconstruction as opposed to surgery, reconstruction AND treatment for breast cancer. The almost 50 per cent risk I have of contracting the disease is way too high.

I'm resolute in my decision to have the surgery, but I have to admit, I'm nervous. I'm sure that feeling will only grow as I approach November; the month in which I've asked to have the surgery. But, it's the right thing for me (and my mom who will undergo the procedure at the same time). I have to do what's right for my life - and I think this procedure will save it.

Tina