Monday, July 4, 2011

The big unknown

As you can imagine, lots of thoughts and ideas keep swirling in my mind about what my upcoming treatment plan will involve. So much is still unknown, including whether I'll even qualify for the clinical trial Dr. H is recommending. 

So here are a few of the highlights plaguing my thoughts:

This clinical trial involves an angiogenesis inhibitor, which is a substance that inhibits the growth of new blood vessels. Cancer cells are rapidly growing cells whose blood supply to help them grow would be affected by this type of drug. But I don't know the name of the drug and my poking around the Internet hasn't yielded any potential names I could research. I wish I would have had the foresight to ask the drug's name.

Dr. H said it's like Avastin, which, as far as I understand, is given via I.V. and this clinical trial involves an oral drug.  Avastin looks promising for ovarian cancer, but the research I've done says it shows promise mostly when used in conjunction with chemotherapy. I'd really rather avoid that form of treatment if I can.


The phase I clinical trial will study drug interactions. One arm of this study will take the inhibitor alone and one will take it in conjunction with diabetes, high blood pressure and heart disease medications to determine how they react together.

Okay, so if the drug company wants to see if it's safe to give the inhibitor to women with ovarian cancer AND another condition, they must be pretty confident in the inhibitor's efficacy. In that case, I think I want to be on the arm of the study that just gets the inhibitor. There are no guarantees what the interactions between the drug could be.

That's if I even qualify to be part of the study. My tumour has to grow at least 0.3 mm. Given the cancer-filled ascities sloshing around in my abdomen I don't think that should be a problem, but it feels wrong to hope my tumour will grow. Ugh.

Of course, my details may also be a bit off because the information about the study parameters was thrown at us as we were trying to absorb the news the fluid is increasing and therefore the cancer is coming back.

Another thought circling my mind is what other clinical trials are out there? Dr. H is confident this is the best option for me right now, but I'd like to know what other studies are recruiting just so I have all the information. I've looked at various study parameters on the Internet, but quickly got overwhelmed. I'll keep looking and may reach out to some of my contacts in the research lab here in London to see if they have any clinical trial details to share with me.

I think part of my frustration stems from the fact I won't know any more details until the end of the month. So again, my family and I live in a state of flux. As a result, I feel I can't wholeheartedly commit to anything. I don't know how I'm going to feel next week and I certainly don't know what's going to happen next month. I know I have to take one day at a time, but man that's difficult to do long term.

I hate the constant stuggle with this stupid disease. I know it's the nature of this beast and that I'll probably be in treatment on and off for the rest of my life, but it doesn't mean I have to like it. I so desparately wish one of these clinical trials - and there are lots - will discover a way to slow down and hopefully stop this awful cancer.

My fingers are continually crossed.

Tina

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