A little embarassing

Bowel movement
Poop
Crap
Shit
Dropping a couple friends by the pool

I never thought defecation would be such a prevalent topic in my life. I talk about it:

To my doctor and nurse
With my husband
To my homecare nurse
In my notes in my healthcare journal
Via Blackberry messenger with my sister
And embarassingly enough, with all of you via my blogs

Of course, when you have children, it's differernt talking about bowel movements. The embarassment wanes with wee ones. You need to ensure they're having them frequently enough and check the consistency. In fact, I even had to catch a load when my son was wandering around diaper-less on the couch one day and I've been known to scoop floaties with my bare hands from the tub after a bathing accident. But we're talking about my little kids, not me.

When this topic of conversation arose with my social worker this week (yup, even talked about it with her), she reassured me it can become a common fixation. When all systems are go, the relevancy of bowel movements fade to the background. They're just a regular part of normal life. But when the poop train pops off the rails - even temporarily - the shit hits the fan.

Think about a time when a gastrointestinal bug gripped your abdomen, rippling it with cramps and leaving you stranded on the toilet with explosive diarrhea. Or when you sit and strain, wishing you could just go. We all have at least isolated (albeit embarassing) incidents with poop problems. Our bodies don't always work the way we want.

Unfortunately, with an illness like cancer, defecation rises in importance. "How are your bowels moving?" is a question I've been asked at almost every appointment since I got sick. It's an indicator of heath. Changes in habits can be signs of other abdominal problems. For me, my lazy bowels are indicative of my lazy stomach and sluggish abdominal system. Sheesh.

But as my social worker assured me, I'm not alone in my focus on poop. Unfortunately, my fixation means all those around me, including you, hear about it as part of my journey with cancer. It's all part of the ups and downs, ins and outs. But I promise, I'll try not to make the stories too crappy.

Tina