A birthday, side effects and a celebration

An important birthday
This week, I became the mother of a teenager. Yup, my son turned 13 years old on Wednesday. He's now taller than me, his voice is low and he requires frequent showers.

Last year, I blogged about how his birth provided my first experience with my own mortality. The grim reapers cold fingers brushed against my skin to remind me how fragile life can be. Yet, 13 years later, here I am. I'm very thankful to celebrate another year with my wonderful, confident and sometimes challenging son.

Olaparib update
I've now experienced eight days on Olaparib maintenance. I'm swallowing the eight, large, white capsules twice a day with, thankfully, minimal side effects. I think I may be developing some gas issues, because I've had some pain in my left ribs and back, which intensified yesterday.

I exerienced these pains on occasion during chemo, so they may be a residual side effect. Another lingering side effect is my numb moustache area (that space between your lips and nose). I don't know if these issues relate directly to the Olaparib or if they're due to residual chemo and its related drugs in my system.

I have to admit, I'm anxious about the next week or so because during treatment, I really started to notice the stomach queasiness during my second week of recovery, when I was only on the trial drug. This is week two, so I'm carefully watching my body's reaction.

But I'm keeping an eye on these side effects and my doc is keeping an eye on me, so I'm sure we'll get to the bottom of this fairly soon. Perhaps there is something the doc can recommend if the side effects stick around.

The acne that I think is related to the steroid, Dexamethasone, is still plaguing my face. I haven't been this pimply since my teenage years - and I don't like it. I was hoping it would be gone by now. Another lesson in patience, I guess.

Ready to celebrate
Michael told me last night that he's finally ready to celebrate the end of my chemo and moving into the next phase of our lives together. When I asked what changed his mind (because he wasn't ready last week) he mentioned my doctor's appointment this week. Although we're still not sure what's up with the lesion on the bowel wall  - is it the mass they've been tracking, is it a new mass, is it simply a thickening of the bowel wall or scar tissues? - Dr. H doesn't seem worried. Now Michael's taking his emotional cues from the doc.

But with the gas/rib pain issues and tiredness that makes me feel as though I've been kicked around the block a few times, I'm now the one who isn't quite ready to celebrate. I'm sure we'll eventually reach the optimistic emotional stage together and plan something.

Last night Michael hugged me and said, "I'm so glad you're still here with me." I agreed. That's the bottom line. I'm still here to celebrate birthdays, love and life.

Even if everything doesn't go your way today, it's far better than not having this Friday at all. Make the most of it.

Tina