Bright eyes

When I was in the midst of chemo treatments, I knew I looked sick. There were the obvious signs: no hair, eyelashes and eyebrows, pale skin, lethargic demeanour. But to me it was something more.

People were kind and said I looked good, especially on those days when I had more energy and colour touched my cheeks. But when I looked at myself in the mirror, I couldn't agree with their assessment.

About a month ago, I saw a photo of myself from last fall, a couple of months after I was done treatment. I admired how good I looked. I thought it was the thin layer of hair and the make up I was wearing. But this week, I realized the healthy look didn't come from something external. The key element was my bright eyes.

During treatment and for a month or two afterwards, my eyes are dull. To me, that says, "girl, you're sick." I'm sure it's from the chemicals coursing through my body, attacking the evil cancer cells.

Last week, I got the sparkle back. I look in the mirror and think I look so much better. Trust me, I know how I look isn't nearly as important as how I feel, but I'm also starting to get more energy and experience fewer side effects from the Olaparib. Obviously, the residual chemo is also leaching from my system, which helps my recovery.

Although, I have to admit, it's also nice to see the bright eyes stare back at me when I look in the mirror. To me, it means good health and I'm extremely thankful for it.

Tina