Brutal

Horrifying
Painful
Less than productive
Awful
Rooting
Torture

Those are a few descriptions I'd use to describe my paracentisis yesterday. It was probably my seventh time having this procedure, which involves sticking a giant needle in my abdomen to draw out excess ascities. This was by far the worst. It was also the least productive with only 1L of the liquid siphoning off.

Dr. W asked a colleague step in because he had no time in his schedule. I remembered this doctor when he performed this procedure on me a couple of years ago and recalled uncomfortable results. The little, optimistic hope I had for a smooth and relatively painless experience was shattered shortly after the process started.

I'm not going into all the gory details, but suffice to say, this doc made me cry. I don't usually produce waterworks during medical procedures. I moan, breathe deeply, grunt and even produce some little wails, but I'm generally pretty stoic..

I staved most of the tears until everyone had left the room, but some sprang to my eyes during the needle exploration in my abdomen. It's tip scraped my bowel a few times, and the entire process felt as though the doc were on a reckless treasure hunt. When I was alone, I broke down from the pain and hideousness of it all.
 
In fact, I'm still sore today and the nurse who watched the procedure (and was flinching) told me I'd probably be bruised for the next few days. Luckily, the chemo seems to be working and fluid production decreasing, so I shouldn't need paracentisis again.

On a positive note, my blood pressure and pulse both dropped, and I can see a decrease in the roundness of my abdomen. But I'm not sure it was worth it.

Tina