I've discovered I can't feel ill without my mind automatically jumping to irrational and unfounded conclusions.
Yesterday, my stomach and abdomen hurt. It was almost like my PMS days when the cramps would make my stomach ache. If I didn't know any better, I'd think it was that time of the month. But all those womanly parts were removed 10 months ago.
Does my body have a memory of all those monthly episodes and is still responding to what should be happening? Do my hormones still work in cycles and therefore, I'll continue to feel different sensations at different times of the month?
Or perhaps I consumed too many vitamins on an empty stomach and it lurched in protest. Perhaps I ate something that didn't agree with me. Maybe I have a minor virus. Heck, maybe I'm having sympathy pains for my mom as she recovers from her first chemo session.
Then again, the illogical part of my mind chimed in, maybe the cancer is back and those pains are from new tumours.
See what I mean. I can't even have a stomach aches without my mind conjuring up the worst case scenario.
I know I'm not going to feel well every day. That's impossible, even for the most healthy person. So I'm going to have to work through the doomsday voice in my head.
My stomach is better, but not perfect, today. I'm tired, but I don't think I'm alone in that state of being. As hard as it is some days, I have to believe I'm cancer-free. My positive attitude is very important.
Tina
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