Attitude

All it takes is a shift in perspective. Instead of focussing on the bad events, people and situations in life or I'm now honing in on the good.

Yesterday, I started exercising again. I decided it was the first day of the rest of my life and I was going to take control. So I walked briskly for 5.5 km, did 30 push ups, 60 leg lifts and 100 sit ups. I was drenched in sweat and breathing heavily. I was absolutely disgusted at how out of shape I am (damn cancer). But instead of letting it get me down, I shifted perspective and said, "It's the starting point of the new Tina."

I know it's going to be a hard, uphill battle. I've lost a lot of strength, muscle tone and stamina due to the toxic chemicals, steroids and lack of use. But I have to start somewhere and this is where I am. So onward.

I'm also more positive in my attitude - and I'm trying to teach my kids the same lesson. Just this morning, I reminded Noah that it only takes a moment to be kind to someone, yet it can make their whole day.

A simple smile and good morning costs us nothing but can be a rich gift to another who hasn't felt kindness yet today.

Of course, it's a lot easier for me to be positive this week because I have no more pain. Yippee! I only have a little occassional tingling left in my limbs and face. I completely understand how those with constant pain can be depressed. I'm in awe at all they go through.

So I'm cautiously optimistic about planning my future. Michael and I booked a celebratory trip yesterday where we can reconnect as a couple instead of a cancer-fighting team. On this trip, I'll gain strength, and mentally process my journey and prepare to have a more normal life.

It's still one day at a time, but I'm choosing to be more positive and to enjoy the little things every day brings.

Tina