My normal life

Going back to work accomplished exactly what I'd hoped it would. I am now living a normal life, with little thought and energy going to cancer (which it doesn't deserve at this point anyway). It doesn't hurt that I now look like a regular person, with a snazzy, short hairstyle. My hair looks look like a conscious choice instead of the result of chemotherapy. Besides, I really like it and get compliments on it all the time.

I LOVE my new eyelashes. They've come in longer and darker than they used to be. That's a bonus. The head on my hair is darker too - if you exclude the silver strands. Incidentally, having grey hair doesn't bother me as much as I thought it would.

My new normal life allows me to focus on regular stuff - work, my kids, Christmas, exercise, the lives of others, getting chores done, etc. Who knew I'd be thankful for the mundane and usual aspects of life.

That's not to say I don't think about cancer any more. It flits through my mind at least once a day. Little events will remind me of it. For example, I noticed a sign at London Life today advertising the blood donor clinic next week. I always took great pride in giving the gift of life by donating. I can't do that any more. On a television show the other night, a character talked about organ donation. I can't do that either. Or a book or television show will talk about cancer and I'll be reminded of my fight. That damn disease changed my perspective on so many things and limited some of the choices I can make.

While those little reminders make me sad sometimes, I'm thankfully living the lessons cancer taught me. I hummed a Christmas carol on my way to work this morning. I hug my kids a little tighter and make sure they know I love them. I try to incorporate more joy into my life by my attitude.

I know as my CT scan and appointment with Dr. W approaches, my mind will once again start to worry and cancer will rear its ugly head. But until then, I'll just carry on and be content with my normal life.

Tina