Hopeful

The capacity for hope is the most significant fact of life. It provides human beings with a sense of destination and the energy to get started. 
- Norman Cousins

I feel hopeful today. Perhaps it's because I feel so much better than I did earlier this week. Maybe it's due to the encouraging appointment in Hamilton yesterday. Or possibly, it's because I have lots of great people in my life and some fun events to anticipate. Whatever, the reason, the soft, yellow halo of hope surrounds me today.
 
Feeling fine
My tastebuds are back, the bone pain is now only a minor inconvenience and the nausea is retreating. I even enjoyed a cup of coffee this morning, with only minor stomach discord.
 
A trip down highway 403
I really like my clinical trial doctor and nurse in Hamilton. They inspire confidence in me. They seem very upbeat about this clinical trial and are watching me carefully to make sure I don't suffer any undue side effects. Angie and I left my appointment yesterday feeling it's worth the drive to Hamilton to be part of this study.
 
I think my doc laughs a little at the supplement I take to boost my immune system. He called it salad in a powder yesterday. But I don't think he necessarily understands how difficult it can be to eat some foods when your stomach is churning. The thought of eating salad some days post chemo makes me want to hurl. So I try to get all my nutrients another way - even if it's in powder format. It may be psychosomatic, but I believe the gritty, green powder that's chock full of fruits, vegetables and vitamins boosts my immune system. And we all know the power of the mind. If I believe it, maybe it's also making it true.
 
Yesterday, I also discovered my mid-point CT scan is scheduled for Aug. 24. Optimistically speaking, that's when they're going to find out the Olaparib is kicking the ovarian cancer's butt.
 
Where oh where
My goodness, it's already the end of July. The upheaval, appointments and craziness in my life is making the summer fly by. I feel I haven't done anything fun for or with my kids. We haven't planned any cool vacations. We haven't scheduled any fun adventures. I know I'm being a bit unrealistic given the time constraints and the heavy appointment schedule, but it still induces a bit of guilt. So my list of to-dos includes trying to find some additional excitement for my kids' summer.
 
Then again maybe I'm being a little too ambitious and placing my expectations of what summer should be on my kids. They, God bless them, haven't complained. Maybe they're perfectly happy being little, summer lumps.

A little bit of fun
That's not to say we don't have some fun events planned. We have a corn roast at the beach this weekend (and I can swim in the lake!) and are looking at a jaunt to a cottage for a few days. I'm also eagerly anticipating a visit from an old friend and her family in August.
 
I also envision some lazy, summer days in the backyard with the pool and the BBQ. Aaahhh.
 
I love summer. I love life. I love the sunny, hopeful glow. Capture it, like a firefly on a warm summer's evening, and hold it in your heart. It's an awesome feeling.
 
Tina