I have some pain in my abdomen this morning, and it worries me a little. I'd like to think it's the chemo eating away at the tumor, but it's been two weeks since my treatment so I have my doubts.
I can also see the ascities expanding my stomach again. I hope it doesn't grow to the point where it requires another draining. While that procedure brought relief, it wasn't pleasant to have my belly punctured with a needle.
While my surgery in 2-1/2 weeks will take care of these niggling worries, I still have 2-1/2 weeks to wait - with the potential for them to get worse.
I have a couple of celebrations in the next two weeks - a 25th wedding anniversary party tonight and my cousin's wedding next weekend. I just hope my bald head and rounded belly don't detract from the lucky couples (ha ha!). Like any activity or event we've attended, we'll stay as long as I feel good and don't get too tired.
I hope to take advantage of this time before my surgery to enjoy some activities and perhaps take a small weekend vacation with my family - because it may be our only summer holiday this year. I only hope these pains (and the worry that accompanies them) don't detract from these goals.
I'm trying to stay positive, and most days I am, but when I experience physical symptoms of the cancer itself (not the side effects of the treatment), I get worried. And now, my surgery date can't come fast enough.
Oh, I'll still be living for today, but anxiously anticipating June 17.
Tina
Darlin girl.
ReplyDeleteI hear your words, and feel your worry, but take time today to listen to the birds, feel the warm sun on your face, and love your family.
June 17th will be here very soon, and then they can get rid of those nasty tumours.
I will never begin to totally understand what you are going through, but this journey has given me an opportunity to know you as a person, appreciate our friendship, and know that this is a friendship that we will work at until we are old and gray. Oh yea, I am already there. Just kidding.
Enjoy this day, and the next couple of weeks. You bring sunshine into my life each and every day with your words, and your caring. You are a remarkable women. Don't ever forget what you are capable of.
I love you with all my heart.
Jane
Before you know it, June 17th will be here!
ReplyDeleteHang in there, sweetheart. As Jane said, we will never be fully capable of understanding what you are going through, just know we are all here.....YOUR PERSONAL CHEERLEADING SQUAD!! Even if we are gray, old, etc, etc.
If you haven't had a chance yet, remember the DVD I told you to get? THE SECRET. You will be amazed...especially with your positive attitude, how good and excited you will feel when you see it.
Don't over do it...you and your body know best. Enjoy every day and do whatever you are capable of. Listen to your heart (ooooo....there is a song....remember it???) LOL!
Take care...and miles of love and hugs...
Rachna