Insight through words

"Writing down our stories validates our experiences, gives us confidences and reminds us that there is a reward in the struggle. It helps us feel less alone." - Cori Howard

Thanks Jane for sharing this wonderful quote. It reinforced the value of capturing my journey. I write because organizing my words provides clarity to my experiences. But I also write because I think - no I know - others can benefit from what I'm going through and the insights it provides. Others can better understand the multiple emotions and actions involved when fighting cancer.

The author of the quote said recounting our stories makes writers feel less alone. I concur because I gain strength from comments readers leave for me, both on my blog and via email. I know many great, loving people walk beside me on this journey.

But the actual fighting is a one person job. I have to do it alone. I can be the only one who fights these nasty cancer cells, struggles through the after-effects of chemo and finishes recovering from surgery (and come to terms with my new body).

Yesterday, I learned my white blood cells, while still acceptable for chemotherapy, are now on the low end of normal. As a result, I'll have to be more vigilant about protecting myself from germs - especially with the spread of the N1H1 virus. That means, I may be more house bound than I've been to date and as a result, more alone.

I was going to send my kids for a week of day camp this summer to let them play with other kids and get out of the house. But given my increasingly precarious immune system and the germs they could pick up, I think it's unwise this year.

The quote mentions the reward for the struggle. My reward? Many more years with the people whom I love, a chance to explore new experiences (and re-live others I want to repeat), an opportunity to share my talent at a job I enjoy (most of the time) and a chance to accomplish goals I've set for myself.

In less broad terms: road trips, sunsets, sunny afternoons at a beach, snorkelling, whipping up a delicious meal or dessert, riding roller coasters with my kids, Bon Jovi concerts, laughing with a glass of wine and friends on a patio, days at the spa, cuddling with Michael, bike rides, waterskiing, family holidays, hair, coffee on a quiet Saturday morning, garage sales, vacations, etc. The list goes on and on.

Life brings many rewards and it's important to recognize the small, seemingly insignificant ones along with the obvious. Each day and the experiences it brings is a gift. The talent lies in recognizing and being thankful for them.

May you find the gifts your day brings.

Tina