The power of positive thought

I've been feeling a bit down the past two days. Pain, discomfort and a setback precipitated the slight shift in attitude. Don't get me wrong, I was still quietly optimistic, but at times I've been sitting still, not smiling, wondering about the pain. I know I have Michael worried.

I've been experiencing a new pain the last two days. On Tuesday night, I started myself and jumped when I dropped a water bottle. Since that time, I've had a non-incision site soreness (sometimes pain) that has me worried. Did my sudden movement pop a stich? Did I do internal damage that will cause healing problems?

I have no blood or fever accompanying this pain and since I'd already seen the doctor on Tuesday, I haven't contacted any medical authority about the issue. I will talk to my oncology nurse this morning to ask whether these types of pains are typical.

During these past two days, I've buried a powerful weapon. A dear friend reminded me yesterday of the power of positive thought. He said, he knew I was going to be okay during my surgery because of all the prayers and positive thoughts generated for me (thanks to all of you). He reminded me that I have control over my experiences by thinking about them in advance.

You know, I do believe to some degree that we can control our own bodies through our thoughts. So, I took my friend's words to heart and have been thinking positive thoughts about today's chemo treatment (one day at a time for me).

So, to make this experience a positive one today, I/my body will:

1. Accept the first chemo needle site (instead of two or three so that I'm a pin cushion covered in bruises)
2. Accept all the chemicals without an allergic reaction
3. Not experience any nausea or vomitting (helped by all my anti-nausea medication)
4. Enjoy a nice breakfast with my sister before my treatment
5. Get into my appointment on time - get in, get out (six hours later)
6. Heal so I don't feel the pain as much

As I laid in bed after taking my meds at 4:30 a.m., I thought about goal 6 and this morning I woke to no pain. There's no guarantee it'll stay that way, but I'm encouraged by this small sign of the power of positive thinking.

I needed the reminder to remain as positive as possible. I know the degree of optimism will change over this journey, but I'd hit a slump, which isn't the best way to approach chemo.

So today is a new, positive day and I say with more conviction than yesterday, bring it on. It's going to be okay.

Tina